President Uchtdorf spoke of a nurse who worked with people who were terminally ill. She asked these people who were preparing to depart this world if they had any regrets. President Uchtdorf's talk is based on their insightful responses--and how we can avoid future regrets. He said, "As I considered what they had said, it struck me how the foundational principles of the gospel of Jesus Christ can affect our life’s direction for good, if only we will apply them."
Regret #1: I wish I had spent more time with the people I love.
What keeps us from spending time with the people we love?- We get busy supporting our family, cleaning the house... we just get detoured. -Misty
- Why do we need to eat and clean so often? There must be a purpose for why we need to do it all the time, even though these things can detract from what seems more important. I haven't figured it out; I just know it must be true. -Bohdana
- I'm such a Martha. -Terri
President Uchtdorf commented that he couldn't envision Christ "bustling between meetings or multitasking to get a list of urgent things accomplished." Instead "...I see the compassionate and caring Son of God purposefully living each day. When He interacted with those around Him, they felt important and loved. He knew the infinite value of the people He met. He blessed them, ministered to them. He lifted them up, healed them. He gave them the precious gift of his time."
Those of us in Relief Society class highlighted some characteristics of the Savior, as shown in 3 Nephi 17:
- Compassionate
- Flexible
- Understands that we need time to learn & grow
- Encircled
- Perceived needs
- Depth of love
- Give of time
- Ministered
- Personal/one-on-one time
- Wept
- Behold
- Purposeful
- Interaction
- Knew infinite value of people
- Made people feel important
- Lifted up
President Uchtdorf said, "Let us resolve to cherish those we love by spending meaningful time with them, doing things together, and cultivating treasured memories." Emily's daughter likes to play in the laundry. Rather than hurry and fold the clothes, one day this week Emily played the "hide in the laundry" game with her daughter. It was such a hit; that's what her daughter reported as the best part of the day when her big brother got home from school.
We can do simple things to enhance our everyday experiences with those we love.
- Leslie said, "My children will be gone soon, so I'm really 'in the present' with them."
- Bonnie shared an experience of a man who had a near-death experience, wherein he felt how he'd made other people feel. When he came back," he was resolved to treat people better.
- Wendy said that the mother really sets the mood of the home. We want to make our homes a sanctuary from the world.
- Sue spent some time with her grandchildren in Oregon recently. She didn't know whose jobs were whose, but she had the children pitch in. If you feel like a martyr, you need to do something differently. Children appreciate stability and structure and won't hate you for making them work.
Regret #2: I wish I had lived up to my potential.
Matthew 6:20 said that we should lay up for ourselves treasures in heaven.President Uchtdorf said, "Let us resolve to follow the Savior and work with diligence to become the person we were designed to become. Let us listen to and obey the promptings of the Holy Spirit. As we do so, Heavenly Father will reveal to us things we never knew about ourselves. He will illuminate the path ahead and open our eyes to see our unknown and perhaps unimagined talents."
Jolie shared that a few years ago she went back to school and got her master's degree. One thing that had been holding her back was her fear of technology. She said some of the kindergarteners she taught seemed to know more about technology than she did. However, going forward opened doors for her that were closed when she was held back by her fears. This was such a powerful lesson for her.
Dianna said that the main reason we're given talents is to help other people. That's why it's so bad to neglect our talents.
Regret #3: I wish I had let myself be happier.
We are in charge of our own happiness. Leslie said that it's really a talent to find happiness, and it's one that Heavenly Father can help us develop.President Uchtdorf said, "Brothers and sisters, no matter our circumstances, no matter our challenges or trials, there is something in each day to embrace and cherish. There is something in each day that can bring gratitude and job if only we will see and appreciate it."
Liz said that one thing she remembered about her mother was that she sang and hummed as she worked. Not long ago, Liz heard her young granddaughter humming and singing as she made some valentines in the craft room. Liz saw that her mother's character carried on, and it was so heart-warming.
Bohdana said women have regrets all the time. We always think we should have done more or we could have done things better. True contentment (the opposite of regret) comes from listening to the spirit and getting back to the basics like prayers and scripture study.
President Uchtdorf concluded his talk with the following remarks, "The path toward fulfilling our divine destiny as sons and daughters of God is an eternal one. ...[W]e must begin to walk that eternal path today; we cannot take for granted one single day. I pray that we will not wait until we are ready to die before we truly learn to live."
